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Struggling Tampa Bay Rays Worst Record, Manager Joe Maddon Hires Seminole Medicine Man

The struggling Tampa Bay Rays have the worst record in baseball. Things have gotten so bad that they have hired a Seminole medicine man. Rays manager Joe Maddon asked Bobby "The Rainmaker" Henry to come and bless the stadium in hopes of changing their luck. So far it hasn't worked but faith requires patience. The ever faithful Maddon is hoping that anything can help the Rays turn this season around.
  • After Cheating Rumors, Golden Tate Fired? Detroit Receiver No Returns Expected

    Premiere Lions receiver Golden Tate has been fired- from his secondary job as a punt returner. Jeremy Ross is the team's return specialist, so Tate won't be expected to do the job he did for Seattle. Detroit wants him to concentrate on offense, even though he has reportedly expressed interest in being available just in case. Of course everyone knows by now Tate has no problem sharing with teammates, as rumor has it he was cheating with Russell Wilson's soon-to-be ex-wife.
  • Calvin Johnson Baby Mama Molly Wop: After Girlfriend Threatened Ex, Megatron Healthy at OTA's

    Though Detroit's Calvin Johnson has been plagued with injuries for the last few seasons he's back and healthy as ever at this spring's Lions OTA's. He's probably glad to be back on the field instead of breaking up fights between his girlfriend and his ex. A few weeks ago Johnson's girlfriend allegedly threatened his baby mama with a molly wop. Those of you without a clue can consult the Urban Dictionary. For now, all is quiet on the home front and Megatron can just concentrate on catching passes.
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