Gotham , New Jersey: Breaking News! Super criminal Victor Fries, A.K.A. Mr. Freeze has released a statement taking responsibility for the polar vortex that has caused a massive blizzard across the nation. [Batman: Arkham Satire]
In a press release that we just obtained, Fries is taking credit for the extreme cold front across the United states and Canada.
Fries, a superpowered mental patient, released a statement to the press regarding the recent drastic increase in frigid temperatures. Fries has obtained an advanced weather controlling device that is somehow forcing cold winds from the North Pole, South.
In his manifesto, Fries writes:
“I will not stop until every man, woman and child feels the cold emptiness I feel, knowing I can never again hold my beloved Nora.”
Fries is referring to his wife Nora, who herself is in a state of cryostasis after falling terminally ill.
Local Gotham talk show host, Jack Ryder, spoke with the city's mayor, Oswald Cobblepot, about the crisis. Cobblepot assured the citizens, who fear that they will be under further attack, that they are safe under his leadership, stating:
“The people of Gotham are a resilient people. We have and will continue to weather any storm we face.”
Mayor Cobblepot did go on to warn citizens to also keep an umbrella handy, incase the freezing temperatures should turn to sleet or hail.
Victor Fries was first arrested in 1992 after he assaulted Gothcorp C.E.O Ferris Boyle. Boyle was set to receive the Humanitarian of the Year award, before Fries crashed the ceremonies.
Fries used a cryogenic ray to incase Wayne Manor, the home of billionaire playboy Bruce Wayne. Fries blamed Ferris for a laboratory accident that resulted in him being dropped into a tank of cryogenic chemicals, resulting in him being unable to live in temperatures above sub-zero.
As a result, Fries used his extensive scientific knowledge to build a mobile life support suit. Hower, the life saving suit enabled Fries, now going by the name Freeze, with superstrength.
Freeze was ultimately stopped by the vigilante known as The Batman. Freeze was later tried and taken to a special cell in Arkham Asylum. Experts tried for years to find a cure for Freeze’s condition.
Freeze is considered armed and extremely dangerous. If you see him contact authorities immediately. Police advise no one to attempt to apprehend Freeze, unless they are a trained martial arts expert, equipped with state of the art crime fighting technology and a thermos of chicken soup.
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