You might have heard that Taylor Swift's brand new album, '1989', was leaked on the internet this week just a matter of days before its official release, but if you listen to it, her fans may very well kill you. According to the gossip news updates, not only are Taye-Taye's loyal legions not downloading the tracks, they are literally threatening bodily harm against anyone who uploads the music on Twitter. According to the latest gossip news updates, Taylor doesn't know who to trust anymore, so she is letting her cats Meredith Grey and Olivia Benson do her decision making for her. It's said that the "Shake It Off" singer has any potential suitor approved by the felines before she even considers dating them seriously.
(Photo : Getty Images for MTV/Jason Merritt)
To describe 24-year-old country music vixen turned pop-artist Taylor Swift's fans as doggedly loyal or religiously rabid, is honestly a bit of an undersell.
After her latest album, '1989', was reportedly leaked according to EnStarz for all the world to download and seed last week, a lesser artist might have worried, but Taylor probably knew that her fans would not only boycott the leak--they'd pretend like they were capable of doing something about it.
The desperate angry tweens did they only thing they could to right the injustice and took to trolling social media and other parts orf the internet with the copious amount of free time they have set aside to do nothing in particular.
Many of Swift's faithful listeners either swore to hate anyone that downloaded the leaked version of her new album or at the very least kill all those ultimately responsible for this modern day holocaust:
Word, has it that Swift's fans are really no crazier than she is; it's even being said that Taylor has gotten so turned around by love in the past that she lets her cats schedule her dates.
A source claiming to be privey to Swift's inside guide to dating told OK! Magazine in time for their latest November 3, issue that Taylor was putting her destiny in Meredith Grey's hands:
"Taylor no longer trusts her own instincts with men...so if she meets a guy the cats have to meet him too.
"She's not walking around with her cats for exercise...they're her man-meter."
It might be time to ask ourselves how well rounded a man is one likely to meet walking around with a cat in your arms like some kind of eccentric James Bond villain.
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